Your Toddler’s Growing Interest in Playing with Others

Your Toddler’s Growing Interest in Playing with Others


Does your baby want to get in the middle of things, socially, at least with his favorite people? With your late infant more mobile and independent at 12-18 months old, you will find him wanting to be involved with all the social activities around him, and consequently, involved with everything you do! It turns out that the beginning of your baby’s second year is a magical time for planting the seeds of Cooperation and for guiding his social development. As he develops the need to socialize, he must first learn emotional intelligence, which will give him the social skills necessary for playing with others.1 Emotional intelligence and social skills are closely connected, since your baby’s emotional state greatly affects how he will interact with those around him.2

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In his attempts at socializing with others, you may find your baby trying to get the attention of other children by pulling on their hair or patting their heads.3 He may show and tell his toys with his friends and even follow the lead of older children at play. As he becomes a more social person, it’s important to begin building Cooperation skills by focusing on positive social activities that will let him develop his patience and the abilities to take turns and cooperate. You should also be prepared to model proper behavior and emotional responses as examples for him to follow.

Children at this age, however, are not quite ready for full-on cooperative play, where turn-taking and cooperation play key roles. They are, however, starting to venture out of the world of solitary play and into that of parallel play.3,4 With solitary play, infants and young toddlers will separately play with toys or do activities in close proximity to others, but without interaction or even awareness that others are nearby.1

In parallel play, young toddlers begin to notice other children, and are influenced by how they are playing. As a result, your baby may decide to play with the same toy as an adjacent child or copy his actions, even though he is still playing by himself.1 By watching other children play and interacting with them on a limited basis, he will learn about the rhythm of play and will be more prepared for sharing when he is ready for playing with others.

It’s important to note that while your baby may want to “play” with other children at this age, some encounters may upset him, as well. For instance, it isn’t unusual for a child to offer a favorite toy to another child in the spirit of sharing, but protest and grab the toy back if and when the other child goes to take it.3

Why does he act this way? Although one part of him wants to cooperate with other children and learn how to share his world with others, he is still primarily egocentric and self-interested.5 He does not fully understand the meaning of these actions, and is still competitive for toys and attention. If this happens to him, be prepared to step in. Ask the other child if he or she can share with your baby. Otherwise, have alternatives or multiple versions of the toys on hand to help resolve standoffs.

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Play Tips:

Do you want to know how you can support your baby’s development of Cooperation skills at this age? It’s easy! Read on for some simple tips to incorporate into your daily play time together.

  1. Encourage children to play near each other. At this age, your baby probably wants to be near other kids, but not want to interact and play with them directly. Even though he is not co-playing now, he will still benefit from playing in close proximity to other children by learning through example and gaining the confidence to co-play with others in the near future.
  2. Provide a variety of toys for all children to play with. Be prepared to help resolve disputes over toys between young children by using a timer to introduce turn taking or providing other toys and objects to play with.
  3. Select a few prized toys for your baby to play with alone. If conflicts come up during group play time and you are unable to resolve the conflict by sharing existing toys, offer a special prize to your baby to redirect his attention. It may also be wise to put his most special loveys away while other children are in his space. This will avoid conflict and anxiety before it can begin.

Developmental Milestones:

Has your baby achieved the following Cooperation developmental milestones yet? If yes, check off all the skill(s) she has already mastered to date using Playful Bee’s developmental milestones tracker. It’s absolutely FREE and easy to use, just click HERE!

  • Chooses to play in the same area as another child.
  • Reacts when another child takes a toy away from her.

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Sources:

1Gellens, Suzanne R. (2013). Building Brains. St. Paul, MN: Redleaf Press.

2Lally, Ronald (1998). Brain Research, Infant Learning, and Child Care Curriculum. Child Care Information Exchange, 121, 45-66.

3Maryland State Department of Education (2010). Healthy Beginnings: Supporting Development and Learning from Birth through Three Years of Age.

4Florida Partnership for School Readiness (2004). Florida Birth to Three Learning and Developmental Standards.

5Grace Children’s Learning Center. Stages of Social-Emotional Development in Children and Teenagers. Grace Children’s Learning Center. Retrieved February 19, 2014, from http://www.graceangels.org/docs/Social_EMotional_Dev_Stages.pdf.

Playful Bee

Education Team at Playful Bee
Playful Bee is an e-Preschool that delivers inquiry-based preschool learning from the classroom to your home. Our preschool curriculum was created by our talented team of rock star teachers. With years of hands-on preschool and Kindergarten teaching experience, they've developed a high-quality preschool experience that is convenient-to-use and easy-to-teach by you, grandparents, or your nanny at home.

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